While You Were Gone
by TheReaperGrimm
Summary: Arnold and his parents move back to San Lorenzo, leaving Helga in the wake of this loss. She struggles to cope with her life, family, and growing up while Arnold is gone. While Arnold is gone, Helga does a tremendous amount of growing up. But what will happen when Arnold finally returns? "The Patakis" spin off of Hey Arnold that never was.
1. The Wake of Your Leave

**A/N: This story is post FTI and post TJM. I'm hoping to pick up on Craig Barlett's idea of the "Patakis" spin off. I'm going to follow the plotline C.B. envisioned as closely as possible. Reviews, suggestions, and comments are welcome! Please do not take any ideas with asking me first, because I am more than willing to share! :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hey Arnold or any of the characters from this awesome show!**

Helga Pataki

_(10 Years old)_

The rain beat against the window of my room as I quietly cried into my pillow. A shot of lightening illuminated the darkness of my room, but failed to reach my heart. Truth be told, I was falling apart. I couldn't bring myself to get up and face the day, not without him, not without my beloved. '_Arnold is gone, criminey, I can't believe he's actually gone! My love, my heart, my soul, is now thousands of miles away from me!' _I screamed inside my head.

A strong sob welled up within me and wracked my body as reality set in. _'What am I going to do without that football headed loser? He was my best friend, he was my crutch, he was my savior, he-he was my… my boyfriend!' _I sobbed. _'I've spent my whole life obsessing over the guy, building shrines to him, writing poetry about him, and stalking him! And now? Well now he was gone, and I'm not sure if I'll ever see him again, or if he even wants to see me again,"_ I thought sadly, _'And the worst part of all of this? I never even got to say goodbye.'_

_ 'And even worse than him being gone, and me not being able to say goodbye, Arnold and I left off on the worst possible note. The day before Arnold was set to leave, we got into a humungous fight…and we broke up.' _I shut my eyes as flashes of memories flooded my mind. Clenching my fists, I fought to swallow the tears that burned within my throat. _'Maybe this was all for the best? Arnold was so happy when he was reunited with his parents, so maybe it was for the best that he left with them to San Lorenzo. After all, that football headed do gooder would be helping out those who needed it. Helping the Green Eyes and the villagers of San Lorenzo just screamed Arnold.'_

_ 'But what about me?' _I thought sadly, _'Did that jerk even think about how I would feel, getting left behind while he moved on to bigger and better things?' _I sighed, _'Well of course he thought about it. He was Arnold after all. Even a blind man could see the heart ache in his eyes the day he told me he would be leaving. It tore me apart inside to see him in such a heart breaking state.'_ But even though I felt this way; mean, bully Helga managed to rear her ugly head and instigate the fight between Arnold and I the day before he left.

_"Helga, I know you!" Arnold exclaimed, "You're really not this mean, angry person you put yourself out to be. You're actually a sweet, kind girl who cares about me a lot. So why are you acting this way? This is our last day together, let's make it a happy one! Please, just stop acting like this!"_

_ "Who's acting?" I quipped._

_ "Helga please… I know that this isn't easy for you, but it isn't easy for me to. I'm sorry. But we'll write each other, I'll call, I'll visit as often as I can," Arnold promised._

_ "Criminey, just forget it!" I yelled._

_ "What? Forget about what?"_

_ "Forget about us. I want to break up."_

I clutched my head in my hands and sat up in my bed. The moment I uttered those words, I knew things would never be the same. Arnold was headed to San Lorenzo, and I was stuck in Hillwood. _'Criminey, get it together Helga ole girl!" _my mind screamed. _'Just one more day till your next session with Dr. Bliss, maybe she can help you get over this slump… Oh who am I kidding? Arnold wasn't a slump, he was my life.' _

_ 'Just get up Helga ole girl. Get up and go for a walk. You need to clear your mind! And for the love of creation, for once in your life, DON'T THINK ABOUT ARNOLD!' _I screamed to myself. Slowly, I dragged my body out of bed and got dressed. As I headed down the stairs of my house and headed out the door, I didn't have the energy to tell Miriam or Bob I was leaving. But it's not like they would have noticed anyways.

I pulled my hood over my head, to shield me from the rain and I took a deep breathe. Heading down my stoop, I looked both ways before crossing the street. And then, BAM! As soon as my feet hit the pavement, I ran. I didn't know where I was going, or what I was doing, I just ran as fast as my legs could carry me. Tears stung my eyes as a bolted down the street.

I felt the feeling of despair and sadness consume me. My tears mixed with the rain and for the while, it looked like I wasn't crying. However appearances fool, because my inner turmoil was eating me alive. As I was running, I tried my hardest not to think about Arnold, but I found that I just couldn't. The sadness was too strong, the hurt was too strong, but most of all, my love was too strong,

'_Criminey, I'm an awful person! Maybe him moving, our fight, and my loneliness is just karma paying me one back. It's not like I ever deserved the honey sweet boy with the cornflower hair. Always looking on the bright side, always seeking the good in others, oh my love, why must you view your cup as half full while I see mine as half empty? Why must cruel fate separate us and mar our otherwise perfect relationship? Why has this black hole been allowed to consume my sunshine, my beloved, my sweet Arnold?'_

'_Ohhh,' _I swooned_, 'my poor beloved, forced to live out our last day together alone and wrought with pain. Cruel fate! Curse my inability to allow change! Curse my anger and bully ways which reared her ugly head and tore me from the patient arms of my beloved. Oh, but I deserve it; it's retribution for my cruelty and unkind ways to poor, undeserving Arnold and all the others. I have made my bed, and now I must lie in it! Forever away from the one I love most; forever away from my heart's true desire. Tis a sad life, but it is my own. And I must suffer the consequences…'_

'_Oh, if only I had thought before I'd spoken! If only the warmth in my heart hadn't ignited the burning flame of my rage and anger! I was only upset with him because I love him! I couldn't bear to see him go, leaving me behind in the wake of his absence, just a distant memory of the past. He even offered to write me, to call me, to visit me, oh poor, forgiving Arnold…Alas! That's it! I'll take him up on his offer! Oh my beloved, I vow to write to you everyday! I will provide detailed accounts of my life as well as our friends' lives. I'll send you poems, soliloquies, sonnets, all testaments of my undying love for you! I'll-' _

"OOOf !" I exclaimed as I suddenly slipped in a mud puddle, "Criminey! Could this day get any worse?"

I stood up and dusted myself off. I was soaking wet and my legs ached from running? "Where am I?" I wondered out loud, struggling to see beyond the pouring rain. I walked a few more steps and suddenly found myself sitting on a familiar stoop and staring at a familiar sign.

Sunset Arms

No Kids

Pets Ok

_'Oh boy, maybe Big Bob's right. Maybe I am a funny farm. Out of all the houses, I end up at Arnold's!'_ I propped my head up on my hand and sat in silence as I sobbed. No matter how many times I would walk past Sunset Arms in the future, Arnold would never be there to greet me. I would never sit near him in class, or eat lunch with him ever again. No more Arnold. The notion hit me all at once.

"No more Arnold," I whispered.

And for the first time in my life, Helga Geraldine Pataki wasn't strong. I felt as weak as could be. I stared at this new girl facing me in the reflection of a puddle. Was this girl really me? I was always strong, always confident…but something in me broke that day. I could feel the cold, lonely girl I truly was overcome me. And for once, I didn't know what to do.

A distant sound finally pulled me out of my deep thought. OINK OINK!

"Abner?" I said as the pig emerged from the house and sat next to me. His sad brown eyes pierced my soul. He hung his head low, unlike the proud little pig I'd come to know in my short time with Arnold. I could feel my heart breaking at the sight. So I picked Abner up and held him in my arms.

"I know Abner," I whispered as I petted him softly, "I miss him too."

And together, we sat in the rain.


	2. After My World Ended

**A/N: Sorry for the delay. I will try to update more frequently and I will try to complete my other fics as well. Reviews, suggestions, and comments are welcome. Now on with the show!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hey Arnold or any of the characters from this awesome show!**

Helga Pataki

_(13 Years old)_

Arnold was gone. Even in my sleep, I couldn't escape my sadness. All through the night, I tossed and turned, wrought with the pain of losing my beloved. I was a ghost; a shadow of my former self. Not even a day without _him_ and I could feel myself falling apart. I was weak. I had allowed my love for him to consume my heart and pick away at the coldness shielding my heart. With him gone, I felt the familiar warmth in my heart that I had become so used to die out. In its place, the coldness returned.

"Love," I spat, "what a fool hardy and useless emotion. So warm and nurturing at first, so soft and lovely! And then, right when you least expect it, the feeling is pulled out right from under you and suddenly you find yourself falling into an endless pit of despair! A fissure of turmoil! A black hole birthed from the very heart that collapsed due to the sudden shock of love lossed…And yet…"

I sighed. Without my muse to guide me, my inspiration ran dry. Why was it that without Arnold I was a shell of my former self? A work of art doomed to never be completed. Was fate really that cruel? Or was I just that unlovable..?

Quietly, I pushed back such thoughts. I felt so bitter and devoid of life. Without him, there was nothing to look forward to in my life. He was the single ray of sunshine to break through the dark cloud that was my life. Without him, everything seemed so…lackluster and so dull. The only things I had left to keep me sane were Phoebe, and my sessions with Dr. Bliss. If I were to lose either of those two now, criminey, I don't know what I'd do. I had so few things to look forward to in life.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I decided that I would not be attending school today. After all, it was Friday, and it was the last day of school. But most importantly, it was the day _he _left Hillwood behind. I knew Bob and Miriam wouldn't notice, my so called "friends" must understand, and our teacher was a no brained dimwit who would know better than to ask any questions.

I was stirred from my thoughts suddenly when I heard a light knocking on my door.

"Helga..?" called a small voice from behind my door.

My eyes shifted to the door, and I immediately knew who it was. Phoebe, oh caring and forever faithful Phoebe. I struggled to find a voice to call out to her, but I found myself unable.

"Oh Helga," called out the soft voice once more, but this time with a little more conviction, "I'm coming in now."

As the door knob turned and she emerged, I felt my dreary spirits lift. As Phoebe rounded the door into my room, I lifted my eyes toward her. She hadn't changed much over the years, and to be honest, I liked it better that way. She was still the small, petite, Japanese-American she always was. Still the bright, intelligent girl she has always been. Her kind and soft personality was untouched by the years and she was still Helga Pataki's best friend, well _only friend._ The only changes Phoebe made were her appearance, but only in the slightest ways. She now wore her hair down, and it touched down to her shoulders. She wore a black pencil skirt under her blue sweater, but other than that, she was still the same old Phoebe.

"What are you doing her Pheebs?" I managed to croak out.

"Helga, school is over. You must have slept the day away."

"..."

"Helga please, I know that you are going through a tough time, but let me in. Let me know how you are feeling!" she pleaded as she walked over to me and sat at the edge of my bed. "You're my best friend Helga, and I know you are stronger than this. I know that you may feel awful but please don't let this consume you!"

"I'm sorry Phoebe," I manage to whisper as I am on the verge of tears, "I just him so much."

I can feel her sad eyes searching mine and she softly rubs my back. I open my mouth to say more, but the tears overcome me and spill from my eyes. I felt so weak, so broken. But, she knows that there is no more need for words. We sit in silence as I cry and Phoebe comforts me, occasionally whispering soft words of encouragement. For the first time in years, I break down in front of Phoebe and she wordlessly comforts me and hands me tissues. I cry and cry until there are no tears left, and then I cry again. Phoebe says nothing as I sputter incoherent sounds and furious curses. She takes it all in and then some. But after a while, she finally speaks up.

"Okay Helga, that's enough," she commands.

"I…wha?" I sputter, a giant glob of mucus hanging out of my nose.

"I said," she continued, pausing to wipe my nose, "that's enough! Your Helga Geraldine Pataki and you are stronger than this. Just because Arnold has left doesn't mean your life is ending!"

I flinch as Phoebe says his name, and I am shocked by her sudden anger.

"What?" she demands, indicating my flinch.

_Geez Pheebs, yell at your best friend while she's having a mental breakdown why dontcha? And while you're at it, speak his name out loud!_ I inwardly scowl. My eyes drift to the floor and I refuse to answer her.

"Is it because I said his name?" she questions, seemingly reading my mind.

Slowly, I nod my head.

"Oh, well in that case, Arnold. Arnold! ARNOLD!" she shouts, "Helga, he may have left, but your life isn't ending! He has promised to contact you and visit you as soon as possible. Please, I'm doing this for your own good."

"I know Phoebe," I say sitting up and rubbing my arm, "I wanna thank you for doing all this and puttin' up with me, ya know? I know I'm not the easiest friend to have."

At the sound of my compliance, Phoebe shoots me a smile. "Helga, just because you get difficult sometimes, doesn't make you any less of a great friend. Why in fact, it makes you an even better friend. I don't expect you to be happy and back to your normal self tomorrow or any time soon in fact. I just want you to know that I'm here for you. And in fact, how about I accompany you to your emergency session with Dr. Bliss? We can get all dressed up, have a girls night, and even have a sleep over! We can-!"

"Pheebs! Too much…"

"Right, shall we?" she says extending her hand out to me.

"Yeah, let's go," I answer unenthusiastically.


End file.
